Yours is the light by which my spirit's born: you are my sun, my moon, and all my stars.*
It’s very tough to see people, who are making choices and making life unbearable for themselves. In Episode 16, we see two people who are truly, madly, and deeply in love with each other but they are floundering and merely existing at the moment. This might be more true for Serkan than for Eda as he really is living in a different reality than she is. His reality is that his family is responsible for something horrible which happened to hers, and if she knew she would be devastated. Her reality is that the man she loves and thought loved her, has broken up with her for a pretty meaningless reason. These differences, in reality, are beginning to be questioned by Eda, thankfully.
We are still in the ‘separation’ phase of our story but the two of them spent a lot of time together for a broken-up couple, which is what we wanted and expected. The narrative is true for them that they really don’t like to be apart. Each one finds excuses to be with the other one. Eda could have had the girls pick her up from Serkan’s if she really wanted to and Serkan didn’t need to be the one to stay up with her all night. They are desperate to spend any time they can together. They share both love and pain and each one would sacrifice for the other.
What I loved
Oh so much.
Eda wakes up in the clinic and doesn’t remember that she and Serkan have broken up. She’s calling him aşkim and touching his face. He’s playing along, which he really doesn’t need to do as he could just fill her in on the details of the last few days, but he doesn’t want to. He wants to enjoy a few moments where she loves him again. To his credit, he doesn’t take advantage of her, she’s touching him not the other way around, but he also doesn’t push her away either. These moments coupled with the flashbacks make me ache with sadness for them.
He’s taking her to the summer house where they spent the night just a few days ago. On the way, she’s being sweet and telling him she will go anywhere with him. She rests her head on his shoulder like she did at the movies and he quietly says that he would give up everything to just live in this moment with her forever.
However, this is short-lived as she turns on the radio and Basak’s song ‘Sen Çal Kapimi’ is playing, and she remembers everything. I loved that Serkan mutters ‘why is this song always playing?’. She demands that he stop the car and when that doesn’t work, she demands to go home. He won’t take her there insisting that the summer house is the best place he can watch over her and it’s close to the hospital. Is there only one hospital in Istanbul? I think not. He also gives the excuse that he doesn’t want to upset Ayfer with the news of Eda’s injury. Is Ayfer 90 years old with a bad heart? No, she isn’t, so this is just an excuse to be the one to look after Eda.
I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you*
They are both overcome with memories from their night together at the house and we are treated to a few more beautiful love scenes as flashbacks. Some of which don’t seem to make sense, granted. There is another breakfast scene that is different than the one we saw in Episode 14. Realistic me realizes that it’s cold now in Turkey and the outdoor breakfast in 14 wouldn’t be possible to re-create without the actors freezing from the cold, so they have an indoor breakfast. Romantic me thinks they had two breakfasts because they went back to bed for a bit for some reason, ahem.
These memories are triggered for both of them, especially Serkan, who is rooted to the spot looking at the bed until Eda asks him to leave so she can get changed. These memories were of the first moments in his whole life where he got to be intimate with the only person he has ever fallen in love with and we see the bleakness on his face as he thinks he will never have that again.
They spend the night in the living room of the house and Serkan has to constantly keep Eda from falling asleep. Eda is uncomfortable and tries to watch tv or read. She does fall asleep a couple of times and he has to shake her awake and blasts loud music to keep her up. She doesn’t want the music and agrees to talk instead, but says she has nothing to say and insists that he be the one to talk. She asks him to tell her the time he hurt someone, the time he was the saddest and when he was happiest. He can’t answer any of these questions and tells her that they shouldn’t be discussing anything personal. She agrees, stating that there isn’t anything personal between them anymore. They are both incredibly sad and she is openly crying. The heartbreak is palpable and further fuels Eda’s conviction that there is another reason for Serkan breaking up with her that he won’t tell her.
The next day, Serkan is losing his mind a bit because Efe is also an alpha male and is refusing to submit to Serkan’s wishes. I actually really, really like the interactions between these two characters. They are very similar and Serkan isn’t used to anyone, other than Eda, questioning his authority. But Efe pushes back against him and doesn’t let him have his way. Efe is also getting fed up with Serkan’s attitude. I am not yet convinced that Efe is going to be an outright villain. Serkan doesn’t want him in the holding but doesn’t want to have him move to another location to work because that would mean he would take Eda out of Art/life and so Serkan insists that he stay. These scenes are so great because it is further proof of how much he wants her around.
Their scenes at the karaoke bar were both sad and funny. Serkan goes to the bar in spite of himself and as he enters, Eda is on stage singing. The song is poignant and he is mesmerized by her. She comes off stage and heads to him and asks about what he had said to her in the car, about wanting to stay in that moment forever but he lies and tells her he was only going along with her not remembering that they were broken up. She doesn’t believe him and tells him that she thinks there is another reason why he broke up with her and she’s going to figure out what that is. He just says okay.
After seeing her talking with Efe, Serkan asks Eda to not do that around him. She asks him "is that what’s bothering you"? Implying that it’s only seeing her with someone else that’s the problem. She goes to walk away from him but he grabs her hand and asks her to dance. Eda, who has had too much to drink, sinks into him a little and at one point is seemly overcome by her proximity to him and makes a little gasp, this makes Serkan laugh and he asks to take her home. This is enough to bring her back to her senses and she tells him he is the last man who should take her home, and this breaks the spell between them.
Trust your heart if the seas catch fire, live by love though the stars walk backward*
Drunk Leyla telling Serkan that he should have thought of flowers and chocolates for Piril that afternoon and then hanging up on him was hysterical, and did we notice her hitting on the bartender?
The girls all being hungover the next morning was very funny and I especially loved that they all had the bedhead and slightly sick look that sold it. Also Erdem and Leyla, in sunglasses with coffee mugs sleeping standing up at Art/Life was gold, Serkan calling Leyla’s name and her muttering ‘I hear him even in my dreams’ was excellent. She really gets some great lines.
Efe and Serkan argue several times this episode but after the karaoke, Serkan tells him that Efe working with Eda is hurting her. It isn’t clear what Serkan means by this but Efe tells him it’s just the reverse that he’s helping Eda by giving her a job especially now that her aunt’s flower shop isn’t doing well and Eda has to pay for university at the same time. This prompts Serkan to immediately call the other landscape architect Ildis and tell her that he knows that she isn’t happy with her plant supplier and he has a great alternative for her. Later Eda thanks Efe because she thinks that he has recommended the flower shop and he doesn’t get a chance to correct her and we don’t know if he will. Another Pride and Prejudice reference, maybe?
Both Aydan and Ayfer question their children about why are they both still wearing their engagement rings? The heartbreaking answer they both give is that it's a reminder not to fall in love with anyone again. Gah.
What I liked
It’s Piril’s birthday but no one remembers except Leyla and Selin. This was a bit sad that neither Serkan nor Engin remembered. Piril thinks that Engin is planning a surprise for her but he’s completely clueless and plans for a night with the guys instead. He only realizes when he video calls her when she is out with the girls and Erdem singing karaoke. Engin knows that he is deep into it and begs the other men to come with him to the bar. Serkan declines of course, but Ferit and Efe go with him. I really wish I liked the Piril/Engin relationship more. It just falls flat, and I cannot for the life of me figure out why they write Engin as so clueless in his own life when he gives decent advice to Serkan about his.
The karaoke was fun and the performances by the actors playing Piril, Erdem and Eda were a treat. Eda singing to Serkan was sweet and sad.
I’m still hopeful that Efe won’t turn out to be a bad guy. I want him to be a good guy, and not just because he has the world’s best dimples. If he is as genuine as he appears to be, it would be refreshing, and other than asking Ferit to buy his shares there hasn't been any outward signs of him being shady until now. He mentions to Ferit that he’s going to put his plan in motion, what that plan is, remains to be seen but if it’s to get back at Serkan, I hope at least there’s a good reason. I’m onboard with him being an agent of Eda’s grandmother but I’m hoping there is something more interesting coming as her plotline rather than she is just out to ruin the Bolats.
What I didn’t like
The writing for Aydan’s character when it comes to Eda. The inconsistency of this character and her reactions to Eda are giving me whiplash. A few episodes ago, she was having apoplexy about Serkan and Eda being together and now she is waxing poetic about Eda to her therapist? I am usually okay with some complexity of reactions in characters but Aydan runs so hot or cold with Eda without any reasons given to us as the audience. Why does she suddenly love Eda again? It’s frustrating and hard to follow when a character doesn’t have a cohesive mindset and waffles back and forth simply to further the story. The writers need to pick a lane when it comes to Aydan. Now it seems so incredibly self-serving on Aydan’s part to ask for Eda’s help her overcome her agoraphobia when a few weeks ago Aydan was actively working to separate Eda and Serkan. She also needs to stop telling Seyfi to shut up.
Alptekin’s pathetic attempt to get Serkan to forgive him was maddening, frankly. They have a lifetime of hurt feelings between them and video football is supposed to help? Alptekin needs to gather up his courage and be the one to tell Ayfer and Eda the truth about what he did all those years ago. It may not be enough to have Serkan forgive him but it’s the only thing he has to demonstrate to his son that he is willing to sacrifice for his son’s happiness.
So, are Ceren and Ferit going to be a thing? Why was Ceren so mad at Eda pointing out that he only broke up with Selin a short while ago? Is Ceren just feeling insecure about everything and didn’t appreciate Eda questioning her? Why are all the secondary romances on this show so weirdly written? Engin and Piril, Ceren and Ferit, and don’t even get me started on Fifi and Erdem.
What needs to happen next
- I know what I want and it Eda finding out the truth sooner rather than later about Alptekin’s involvement in her parent's death, but I have a feeling they are going to drag that out for a while by having other distractions in the story
- I want to know one way or the other about Efe, and his ties to Serkan and Eda’s grandmother.
- Aydan and Alptekin need to get their act together and figure out how to help their son regain his happiness. Given the crappy childhood they gave him, it’s the least they can do.
All in all a great episode and I really enjoyed it. It’s frustrating that Eda and Serkan are still not reconciled but the rom-com playbook says we have a few more episodes to go until that happens. It was very Eda and Serkan-centric, which I have no problem with, but they have created a great cast of secondary characters and I would like there to be more story with them that adds to the plot rather than just as filler.
I think the main focus of this week’s episode was to reinforce the truth that Serkan and Eda love each other very much and it isn’t a lack of love that has caused them to be parted. We got to experience a little more of the brief period where they got to be happy and it makes the separation both harder and sweeter. Harder because it hurts so much and sweeter because in their separation we see the seeds of forgiveness, understanding and desire. We see the level of caring and connection even as they are in conflict with one another. This isn’t just love, it’s true love and the coincidences that have torn them apart are also what brought them together in the first place. Their love is epic and written in the stars and the battle now is to overcome the outside forces that have caused the separation.
We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit.*
* all quotes are from the works of E.E cummings